scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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