Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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