when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
