She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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