we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
