come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
