just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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