Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
