if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
