Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
