The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
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