I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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