so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
