I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
you are never too drunk for berry picking
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
