she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
