did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
it's like iHOP with fire
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
