I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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