i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
The beers last night were like the tears from god
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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