Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
