so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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