ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
