grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
It's blow job season.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
