If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Randomize
