you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
where are my eyebrows?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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