She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
