why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
