I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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