My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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