Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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