I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
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