Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
