Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.

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(740): View more from Ohio

He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over

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(804): View more from Virginia

you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms

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(586): View more from Michigan

hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?

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(512): View more from Texas

Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own

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(347): View more from New York

He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.

(978): View more from Massachusetts

I am to reach this level of casual destruction.

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(353): View more from

He did a backflip because drugs

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