I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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