Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
