I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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