Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize