If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
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