Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I will die if light touches me.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
