Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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