you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
