That's intense
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
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