Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
