i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
