If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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