So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
