i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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