That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
