I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
