So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
