i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
