He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize