sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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